“Everything happens for a reason”. I’m sure if you had a
dime for every time you heard that you would be rich. And yet, there seems to
be this unspoken understanding amongst people to respond in some sort of
platonic and philosophical manner. Whether it’s a slight nod of the head, or a
response like, “you’re absolutely right.” However sometimes in the heat of the
situation it’s difficult to understand what that actual reason is.
We’re busy. I mean that in both a physical and mental way.
Our day to day lives make us constantly on the go. We’re programmed from
culture, society, personal experience, to “go, go, go.” In fact, not only do we
pride ourselves on being multi-taskers, but a lot of times we are rewarded for
it. The problem is we all become so busy that when the Universe is talking to
us and sending us signs, we don’t always listen, and pay attention. So
sometimes the Universe has to use extreme forces and bring out the figurative
sledgehammer to get our attentions.
A couple of years ago I was in this car accident. However I
think I should preface this story by going back a couple of days. I was going
through this horrible break up that lasted WAYYY longer then it should have. (I
was young what can I say?) And I’m not talking like a bad break up where you
eat a pint of ice cream, cry yourself to sleep, and all is well a few days
later. I’m talking like the mother of all bad break ups. The holy grail of
heartwrenching, jaw dropping, oh my god I think I might die break up. I was completely depleted, depressed, and had
loss all hope. Finally one night the last straw had been set on the camels back
and I had lost it. I got in my car and just drove all night. Crying, screaming
at the Universe for putting me through what it had. There was absolutely no
reason for the cruel and horrible torture I had been suffering. I wondered if
the Universe had forgotten about me, wondered if the Universe even cared about
me. Fast forward to a day in a half later, I got in a car accident. I was
driving down the interstate, there was black ice, I was on a bridge, and there
was a semi in front, next to, and behind me. I hit a patch of black ice and
spun completely out of control. I had no way of regaining control of my car. I
was just waiting to hit something or someone. I remember at one point my car
had spun backwards into the next lane and I was staring dead at the truck
driver who was next to me. Although at this point my front was facing his front
as I was driving backwards. I’m sure it only lasted a few seconds, but I swear
it felt longer and I could see the look in his eyes. I finally hit the guard
rail on the side of the bridge. The car finally stopped. I was in utter shock.
I was literally a couple feet from where the guardrail ended and the drop-off
from the bridge was open. A few feet more and I would have gone off the bridge.
I wasn’t hurt, not a scratch on me. Luckily, I didn’t hit anyone even though I
was surrounded by all those trucks. And finally it hit me- My not so quiet
conversation with the Universe less than the 48 before… it was answering back. Hitting me, (and hard)
with its sledgehammer. Telling me that I was not alone, and no I had not been
forgotten. And if I’m being completely honest I feel that the Universe was
telling me that I better have a little respect because my life could be taken
at any moment if it so desired.
Did this accident
happen for a reason? As crazy as it sounds, I believe it did. Because life is
not some mere roll of the dice, but rather, a woven tapestry of experiences of
great significance. Every event we have is important, from the most inspired
and enlightened to the seemingly unexplainable, or incomprehensible.
Unfortunately as humans we don’t really have a good perspective on the “big
picture.” Sure some are better at seeing
it than others, but for the majority of us we have to practice, stop and really
think about how everything is connected. If I wouldn’t have been in that
accident right after my huge meltdown, I wouldn’t have known if the Universe
was really there, and paying attention to what it was doing. That accident
re-affirmed my belief, which in turn made me believe that what I was going
through with my ex had a purpose. Years later, looking back I could tell you
exactly what that purpose was, what I learned, and how better off I am for it.
Sure it was hard, and it sucked, and yeah I could have lived without some
parts. But overall, I needed all of it (the relationship, the grueling
break-up, the accident) to all happen.
Because who knows what kind of person I would be today if all that
didn’t happen? It all happened for a
reason.
You might be a
little skeptical, which is okay, but think about this: by believing that
everything happens for a reason you are consequently avoiding blaming others
and yourself. Blaming yourself or someone else only makes the situation worse.
It NEVER fixes the situation.
Imagine for a
moment that you 100% believe everything does happen for a reason. No matter how
big or what the problem is, it’s all for a purpose. Now how do you feel? For
me, I feel calmer, lighter even, knowing that I am part of some bigger plan,
the criticism, the negative emotions they are all diminishing. Try it, I think
you will agree.
Look for those
times in your life because everything will change. You will become stronger,
more confident, and feel a greater connection to the Universe. Walking with a
purpose to live the life of your dreams, all while knowing that everything does
indeed happen for a reason.